Ahhhh, a fruit rollup. This is something that makes the whole world joyful. I observed this delicious item using every sense. The first thing i noticed was the feel of it. The wrapper was smooth, and when i opened it, the fruit rollup was sticky and felt thin and easy to rip. Then the smell kicked in. It made me crazy. I had to use all my control to not eat it right then. It smelled of a basket of berries and made my mouth water. The sound was very crinkly and sharp as I unwrapped the treat. It looked to me like it had tatoos within the blue and green swirls of the rollup, and the wrapper had many colors of splats. As I placed the fruit rollup in my mouth, I was a very happy person. The flavor exploded in mouth with all the berry sensation. It was extremely delicious. However, it was gone MUCH too fast.
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Ahhhh, a fruit roll up. This is something that makes the whole world joyful. I observed this delicious item using every sense. The first thing I noticed was how it felt. The wrapper was smooth, and I tore it apart to uncover the thin, easy rip, sticky fruit roll up. The smell of the tropical raspberry rapidly drove in. I had used all my energy to control myself from planting the thin fruity snack in my mouth. The smell of baskets of berries made my mouth water even more. The sharp crinkly noise filled my ears, as I unwrapped the treat. The fruit roll up looked to me with its tattoos within the blue and green swirls. Finally, I placed the fruit roll up in my mouth. And from a person of desperate need, I had turned into a person with joy. The fruit ran up through my body and veins. The flavor exploded in mouth with all the berry sensation. The deliciousness of the roll up made me hunger for more. The fruit roll up had melted in my mouth, too fast.
Well. First of all, I agree with you when you said the roll up was gone too fast. I wish I understood why you said, "I was a very happy person." I found that I could tell that you were happy. I really liked what you wrote about the fruit roll up. You made me hungry! I really loved how you described the color of the roll up.Maybe, in the future, you could use more similes. =D
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